I have finished seven big stars for the center of Nantucket. I have followed the pattern instructions pretty much, making my stars all the same fabric, and the backgrounds scrappy. My sew along friends are choosing different options–mainly making their backgrounds the same. I kind of liked the controlled chaos of the scrappy backgrounds.
This week looks as if it will pretty easy as far as my schedule goes. I have Grandpa to care for, but Eva is going for a visit with her other grandma, so that lightens up my time considerably. My plan is to concentrate heavily on Nantucket and make major strides toward completion of this quilt. Woo hoo! A week of sewing timel What a gift. Let's just see what I do with it.
Do you recall I asked last week about how you use those fun little 2 1/5 inch squares called Moda Candy? Sherri of A Quilting Life is doing a number of posts on exactly that subject. Loads of ideas. Check it out.
Back is about the same. I am forgoing the muscle relaxants, as they make me feel queer, and require that I give up chardonnay. Advil seems to be doing the trick of keeping the pain a dull ache. My car is supposed to be ready on the 18th, and in the mean time am using an extra car we have available in the family. An unexpected wrinkle in my schedule is that Grandpa tells me he is lonely and wants to spend the entire day with me, and not stay on his own in his own home. So now I am part preschool and part geriatric care provider. I don't mind really. I pick him up around 10:00 AM and take him to my house and he just moves from comfy chair to the front porch to the back porch and back to the comfy chair, and then I take him home again. I actually feel more comfortable being able to watch him with my own eyes.
Dementia is a weird condition. Do any of you have experience with patients with dementia being all mixed up about day and night? Grandpa goes to bed around 9:00, gets up around 12:00 or 1:00 and is wandering around his house all night. Daytime? He wants to snooze in his chair all day. We have tried Tylenol PM, giving him snacks in case he is hungry–everything short of a real sleep aid that will knock him out. I'd love to know if any of you have experienced this and how you dealt with it. His caretaker is not a happy camper.
42 responses to “Nantucket Coming Along and Dementia Question”
I have similar problem with mum she tells me she isnt sleeping but oes to bed at 7.30 after watching TV most of the day. She wakes up at 2 am and cant go back to sleep until 7 am then sleeps till 9 or so. Dementia combined with athritis is a bugger not much we can do except make sure they are safe.
I have similar problem with mum she tells me she isnt sleeping but oes to bed at 7.30 after watching TV most of the day. She wakes up at 2 am and cant go back to sleep until 7 am then sleeps till 9 or so. Dementia combined with athritis is a bugger not much we can do except make sure they are safe.
Hi Nicole,
We had an aunt who had dementia. The best thing we did was to read a book called The 36 Hour Day. It really opened our eyes about dementia and alzheimers. You can find it on Amazon, and I would highly recommend reading it.
http://www.amazon.com/36-Hour-Day-Alzheimer-Dementing-Illnesses/dp/0801865212/ref=sr_1_10?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1384175112&sr=1-10&keywords=the+46+hour+day
One thing about giving Grandpa sleeping aids to knock him out, is that it may make him more unstable when he does wake up. You don’t want him falling.
Hi Nicole,
We had an aunt who had dementia. The best thing we did was to read a book called The 36 Hour Day. It really opened our eyes about dementia and alzheimers. You can find it on Amazon, and I would highly recommend reading it.
http://www.amazon.com/36-Hour-Day-Alzheimer-Dementing-Illnesses/dp/0801865212/ref=sr_1_10?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1384175112&sr=1-10&keywords=the+46+hour+day
One thing about giving Grandpa sleeping aids to knock him out, is that it may make him more unstable when he does wake up. You don’t want him falling.
Applause, applause for your progress on Nantucket and for a week of sewing time ahead. May it be so!
I’ll be away until the 21st so may have no computer access. I’ll miss you if that’s the case.
It may be the case that Grandpa just needs less sleep now as that is true for many elders.
My sweet mother had Alzheimer’s for the last 3 or so years of her life and I learned a lot about that kind of dementia.
The turn-around of daytime and nighttime in Alzheimer’s is called “sundowning” and the sleep pattern with that is much as you describe. By the time my mother was at this stage, she lived in an assisted living facility so would go downstairs and talk to the night staff. At some point in the wee hours, they would take her back to her apartment and put her back to bed. It’s all about keeping these wakeful sweeties warm, safe, dry, and fed. You may need a nighttime caregiver for Grandpa.
The only “benefit” for the family to having an elder with Alzheimer’s is that there is a definite pattern called the 7 Stages of Alzheimer’s that describes the behaviors seen at each stage. You know what to expect next. Each patient spends different amounts of time in each stage, but as the stages advance, the abilities decline. Alzheimer’s is terminal as the brain loses the ability to even direct digestion.
Hugs!
Applause, applause for your progress on Nantucket and for a week of sewing time ahead. May it be so!
I’ll be away until the 21st so may have no computer access. I’ll miss you if that’s the case.
It may be the case that Grandpa just needs less sleep now as that is true for many elders.
My sweet mother had Alzheimer’s for the last 3 or so years of her life and I learned a lot about that kind of dementia.
The turn-around of daytime and nighttime in Alzheimer’s is called “sundowning” and the sleep pattern with that is much as you describe. By the time my mother was at this stage, she lived in an assisted living facility so would go downstairs and talk to the night staff. At some point in the wee hours, they would take her back to her apartment and put her back to bed. It’s all about keeping these wakeful sweeties warm, safe, dry, and fed. You may need a nighttime caregiver for Grandpa.
The only “benefit” for the family to having an elder with Alzheimer’s is that there is a definite pattern called the 7 Stages of Alzheimer’s that describes the behaviors seen at each stage. You know what to expect next. Each patient spends different amounts of time in each stage, but as the stages advance, the abilities decline. Alzheimer’s is terminal as the brain loses the ability to even direct digestion.
Hugs!
Hi Nicole! I’m glad to hear your back isn’t keeping you down. I’m like you, due to health issues there are certain meds I have to take to remain functional, but even though I have muscle relaxers ordered by the doctor, I have not picked them up because of all the medications that is one that also make me feel ‘queer’, actually really weird, like I’m not in control of my body and I HATE that feeling. However, if the muscle spasms get worse at night, that’s when mine were the worst after our accident, you could forgo the Chardonnay after say 5 or 6 hours before bedtime, then you would be able to take a muscle relaxer to help you through the night. OH, if you do find you hurt bad enough to take them, try breaking them in half, that helped cut down on the weird feeling when I did try them. Okay, nuff said about that. About the dementia and the upside down sleeping habits. My mom and dad built an apartment attached to our home when I was in my late teens and early twenties. The apartment was for my grandmother who had Alzheimer’s and she too would want to wander the house at night and sleep during the day. But fortunately, at our house, there was mom, dad, and me to help out. Mainly we just rode it out when she got her days and nights mixed up, because she acually believed that it was daytime in the middle of the night and vice, versa. So there was no way to reason with her. It isn’t an easy job, my mom was worn to a frazzle, but she didn’t mind. What a blessing it is to our geriatric loved ones when someone who loves and cares about them is willing to take on the task. So many people just refuse to even try. I’m keeping you and yours in my thoughts and prayers. God bless and keep…
Hi Nicole! I’m glad to hear your back isn’t keeping you down. I’m like you, due to health issues there are certain meds I have to take to remain functional, but even though I have muscle relaxers ordered by the doctor, I have not picked them up because of all the medications that is one that also make me feel ‘queer’, actually really weird, like I’m not in control of my body and I HATE that feeling. However, if the muscle spasms get worse at night, that’s when mine were the worst after our accident, you could forgo the Chardonnay after say 5 or 6 hours before bedtime, then you would be able to take a muscle relaxer to help you through the night. OH, if you do find you hurt bad enough to take them, try breaking them in half, that helped cut down on the weird feeling when I did try them. Okay, nuff said about that. About the dementia and the upside down sleeping habits. My mom and dad built an apartment attached to our home when I was in my late teens and early twenties. The apartment was for my grandmother who had Alzheimer’s and she too would want to wander the house at night and sleep during the day. But fortunately, at our house, there was mom, dad, and me to help out. Mainly we just rode it out when she got her days and nights mixed up, because she acually believed that it was daytime in the middle of the night and vice, versa. So there was no way to reason with her. It isn’t an easy job, my mom was worn to a frazzle, but she didn’t mind. What a blessing it is to our geriatric loved ones when someone who loves and cares about them is willing to take on the task. So many people just refuse to even try. I’m keeping you and yours in my thoughts and prayers. God bless and keep…
Bless you Nicole! Sundowning is a part of Alzheimer’s and it will continue. And you really need a caregiver who understands sundowning. One who isn’t a “happy camper” might not be the right fit for him.
I agree that “36 Hours” is the best help you can get on your own. If Grandpa has dementia your whole family would benefit from a help group. Alzheimer-affected caregivers often feel like this is the first time this ever happened to anyone. That is so not true. http://www.alz.org is a wonderful resource.
Bless you Nicole! Sundowning is a part of Alzheimer’s and it will continue. And you really need a caregiver who understands sundowning. One who isn’t a “happy camper” might not be the right fit for him.
I agree that “36 Hours” is the best help you can get on your own. If Grandpa has dementia your whole family would benefit from a help group. Alzheimer-affected caregivers often feel like this is the first time this ever happened to anyone. That is so not true. http://www.alz.org is a wonderful resource.
I’m loving your nantucket and the scrappy background.
Taking care of aging parents/grandparents is hard! I don’t have any wise words about he sleeping problems.
I’m loving your nantucket and the scrappy background.
Taking care of aging parents/grandparents is hard! I don’t have any wise words about he sleeping problems.
I like that red and tan color scheme. My awesomer-half wants to buy a Ford Mustang in those colors; scarlet red with a tan leather interior. 🙂
I like that red and tan color scheme. My awesomer-half wants to buy a Ford Mustang in those colors; scarlet red with a tan leather interior. 🙂
Poor Grandpa! I’ve heard of the sleep disturbance issue. Heck, I’ve had my own sleep disturbance with hormonal changes!
I have no good advice to offer on that front. It is nice that he can come spend the day at your house. 😛
Poor Grandpa! I’ve heard of the sleep disturbance issue. Heck, I’ve had my own sleep disturbance with hormonal changes!
I have no good advice to offer on that front. It is nice that he can come spend the day at your house. 😛
Thanks for the mention on my blog series!
I don’t know how you do it all really. Being a caregiver is such a huge task, and after reading all of the comments there is just so much I didn’t realize about dementia and Alzheimer’s. I’m glad you are able to sew…it must be the best reward for all of your work!
Thanks for the mention on my blog series!
I don’t know how you do it all really. Being a caregiver is such a huge task, and after reading all of the comments there is just so much I didn’t realize about dementia and Alzheimer’s. I’m glad you are able to sew…it must be the best reward for all of your work!
I guess I can’t give you anymore advice then others did. We take care of my husband’s 92 year old father and he does the same thing. He also is blind and hard of hearing so that really adds to the confusion. I would not give him any drugs until you consult a doctor and see what the side effects and issues are with it. I found my father in law going through the garbage at 2 AM this morning. He doesn’t remember doing any of it in the morning. You probably need night care staff for him. Good luck!
I guess I can’t give you anymore advice then others did. We take care of my husband’s 92 year old father and he does the same thing. He also is blind and hard of hearing so that really adds to the confusion. I would not give him any drugs until you consult a doctor and see what the side effects and issues are with it. I found my father in law going through the garbage at 2 AM this morning. He doesn’t remember doing any of it in the morning. You probably need night care staff for him. Good luck!
Loving your Nantucket Nicole. This midwinter reds are so YOU!
I’m glad you are able to get by without the heavy duty pain meds…giving up Chardonnay is not a good option 😉
Loving your Nantucket Nicole. This midwinter reds are so YOU!
I’m glad you are able to get by without the heavy duty pain meds…giving up Chardonnay is not a good option 😉
Being a caregiver is a huge responsibility. You’ll never regret the time spent with Grandpa. I have no advice to offer except to say I recognize the job you’re doing is so important! Be sure to take care of yourself, too!
Being a caregiver is a huge responsibility. You’ll never regret the time spent with Grandpa. I have no advice to offer except to say I recognize the job you’re doing is so important! Be sure to take care of yourself, too!
I took care of both in-laws one had Alzheimer and the other dementia (it was fun). This went on off and on throughout their last four years. #1 you can use drugs, I used this as a last resort as I had 4 teenagers also. #2 let them have something to do when they get up! My FIL had a small file cabinet that I filled with fake documents. He loved to file, take them out and refile. He would do at all hours of the night. I took them during the day to an adult day care. It was private and we had to pay but it fed them lunch and they had activities throughout the day….it tired their butt out! When I picked them up they had dinner within an hour then a bath…then bed. A schedule helped also. It was hell but worth it. the end! The FIL lived to 90 and the MIL to 94.
I took care of both in-laws one had Alzheimer and the other dementia (it was fun). This went on off and on throughout their last four years. #1 you can use drugs, I used this as a last resort as I had 4 teenagers also. #2 let them have something to do when they get up! My FIL had a small file cabinet that I filled with fake documents. He loved to file, take them out and refile. He would do at all hours of the night. I took them during the day to an adult day care. It was private and we had to pay but it fed them lunch and they had activities throughout the day….it tired their butt out! When I picked them up they had dinner within an hour then a bath…then bed. A schedule helped also. It was hell but worth it. the end! The FIL lived to 90 and the MIL to 94.
I am sorry that your back isn’t much better. Your blocks are great! I love the mix of light variations in your backgrounds.
I am just learning about all of the stages of Dementia and Alzheimers. None of it is positive.
I am sorry that your back isn’t much better. Your blocks are great! I love the mix of light variations in your backgrounds.
I am just learning about all of the stages of Dementia and Alzheimers. None of it is positive.
So you made every one of those flying geese separately? Wow!
My mother died with Alzheimer’s in 1996. I still can’t talk about it.
Much love.
n, np
So you made every one of those flying geese separately? Wow!
My mother died with Alzheimer’s in 1996. I still can’t talk about it.
Much love.
n, np
I love love love your red star quilt. I think the variety in background fabrics adds so much. I am doing the same sort of thing with my Patchwork of the Crosses blocks.
I love love love your red star quilt. I think the variety in background fabrics adds so much. I am doing the same sort of thing with my Patchwork of the Crosses blocks.
From experience I suggest you get a night time care giver who stays awake with him. My father does the same thing. About 1am he starts his routine of pacing all through the house and looking around, sitting down, getting up, looking out the window, going into the kitchen, etc. The nursing home was not a fun choice, but he needs more 24 hour care than we can give him.
Trying sleep aids will just cause other problems like falling, weight loss and dehydration since they would rather sleep than eat or drink. Dehydration is a big enemy. It caused more confusion and can trigger strange behavior.
From experience I suggest you get a night time care giver who stays awake with him. My father does the same thing. About 1am he starts his routine of pacing all through the house and looking around, sitting down, getting up, looking out the window, going into the kitchen, etc. The nursing home was not a fun choice, but he needs more 24 hour care than we can give him.
Trying sleep aids will just cause other problems like falling, weight loss and dehydration since they would rather sleep than eat or drink. Dehydration is a big enemy. It caused more confusion and can trigger strange behavior.
I love your red stars with the scrappy tan and beige background. It is lovely.
I would suggest reading the book “Grain Brain” by Dr David Perlmutter. There are some things in there that are worth a try.
I love your red stars with the scrappy tan and beige background. It is lovely.
I would suggest reading the book “Grain Brain” by Dr David Perlmutter. There are some things in there that are worth a try.
Love the Nantucket colors, and anything stars is a favorite.
Both my mother and MIL had dementia for many years, and later on, my FIL also. My dad had died many years earlier of heart attack. The interesting thing is that my mom and my inlaws refused to live with us. All needed care, so living alone was not an option. None of them would allow caregivers into their homes. MIL was combative and required that she be hospitalized until stabilized and went from there to an asst. living facility where FIL joined her. When they first went into the Center, they enjoyed the company and activity around them. As time went on, it was a struggle to prevent their isolationism. After a few years, MIL developed the sundowning. Sleep meds did not help and made her groggy in the daytime. MIL passed at age 97; FIL at 100+.
Since grampa does not have a roommate to annoy with the problem, the presence of a nighttime attendant to keep him company and look out for his safety might be a workable solution. It’s wonderful that he can spend some daytime hours with you. We had thought my FIL would like to do that, but it was boring here at home. There was a lot more going on at the center! 🙂
Love the Nantucket colors, and anything stars is a favorite.
Both my mother and MIL had dementia for many years, and later on, my FIL also. My dad had died many years earlier of heart attack. The interesting thing is that my mom and my inlaws refused to live with us. All needed care, so living alone was not an option. None of them would allow caregivers into their homes. MIL was combative and required that she be hospitalized until stabilized and went from there to an asst. living facility where FIL joined her. When they first went into the Center, they enjoyed the company and activity around them. As time went on, it was a struggle to prevent their isolationism. After a few years, MIL developed the sundowning. Sleep meds did not help and made her groggy in the daytime. MIL passed at age 97; FIL at 100+.
Since grampa does not have a roommate to annoy with the problem, the presence of a nighttime attendant to keep him company and look out for his safety might be a workable solution. It’s wonderful that he can spend some daytime hours with you. We had thought my FIL would like to do that, but it was boring here at home. There was a lot more going on at the center! 🙂
This isn’t so much advice as interesting factoid.
Before there was electricity, before there was enough fuel, when our forefathers had to hoard candle bits, people went to bed when it got dark. That’s not news, but what was to me, is that they only slept a few hours, then got up again in the middle of the night for a while. That’s when they had “supper”, and maybe did a couple more things. Then they went back to bed until morning. It was called “second sleep.”
They didn’t go anywhere, because traveling, even to the next house or farm, was treacherous. Not only were there wild animals, but also thieves, and if your horse got spooked and threw you, or you tripped and injured an ankle or something, it would be daylight before anyone could even come looking for you. That could be too late.
So he’s just doing what came naturally before electricity, what our ancestors did. Maybe a light meal in the middle of the night, soup or scrambled eggs or something, would be enough to satisfy him and send him back to bed. Most older folks don’t each much at a time anyway, and it’s a long time from dinner to breakfast. He could be a little hungry.
This isn’t so much advice as interesting factoid.
Before there was electricity, before there was enough fuel, when our forefathers had to hoard candle bits, people went to bed when it got dark. That’s not news, but what was to me, is that they only slept a few hours, then got up again in the middle of the night for a while. That’s when they had “supper”, and maybe did a couple more things. Then they went back to bed until morning. It was called “second sleep.”
They didn’t go anywhere, because traveling, even to the next house or farm, was treacherous. Not only were there wild animals, but also thieves, and if your horse got spooked and threw you, or you tripped and injured an ankle or something, it would be daylight before anyone could even come looking for you. That could be too late.
So he’s just doing what came naturally before electricity, what our ancestors did. Maybe a light meal in the middle of the night, soup or scrambled eggs or something, would be enough to satisfy him and send him back to bed. Most older folks don’t each much at a time anyway, and it’s a long time from dinner to breakfast. He could be a little hungry.
My FIL had Dementia and loved to be up at all hours of the night them sleep off and on during the day. He would wake up at 2 am and wanted to go to work. Before I went to bed at night, I would pack his ‘work lunch box’ and left it next to his bed. This did help for awhile as he would stay in bed and eat then usually fall back to sleep. He and my MIL lived with us. FIL passed away 3 years ago but MIL is still in pretty good shape for 93. She has vascular dementia and has TIA’s. Thank goodness she sleeps most of the night! Good luck and maybe a private caregiver at night is what he needs.
My FIL had Dementia and loved to be up at all hours of the night them sleep off and on during the day. He would wake up at 2 am and wanted to go to work. Before I went to bed at night, I would pack his ‘work lunch box’ and left it next to his bed. This did help for awhile as he would stay in bed and eat then usually fall back to sleep. He and my MIL lived with us. FIL passed away 3 years ago but MIL is still in pretty good shape for 93. She has vascular dementia and has TIA’s. Thank goodness she sleeps most of the night! Good luck and maybe a private caregiver at night is what he needs.